


A Christmas Wish

by writingdesire123



Category: Orange is the New Black
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-05 00:35:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16800178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingdesire123/pseuds/writingdesire123
Summary: Lorna is haunted by three familiar faces, in an attempt to persuade her to do the right thing.Based of A Christmas Carol





	1. The Wedding

Looking in the dirty bathroom mirror Lorna smiled at herself thinking about the day she had just had. She had finally married her perfect man. She knew that the wedding its self was not what she spent years planning when she was younger, but it would have to make do. As the bathroom door opened, Lorna looked across to see Piper enter. 

"Hey Bride," she greeted, stepping closer to Lorna. Before Lorna had the chance to reply, Piper spoke once again. 

"We have a little surprise for you in the common room." 

"Really?" Lorna asked, getting excited. 

"Come on," Piper grabbed Lorna's hand and dragged her out of the bathroom and began to navigate the both of them through the dingy corridors of the prison. 

As they reached the common room, Piper gently placed her hands over Lorna's eyes in order to prevent her from seeing. She guided Lorna inside the room and uncovered her eyes. 

"Surprise!" Shouted around thirty inmates who were gathered around. There was a banner high on a wall with the words 'congratulations' written messily on the loo roll. There was a table in the far corner with cups of juice, cookies and a cake, once again with 'congratulations' iced on the top. 

"Wow, this is amazing," Lorna said as she looked around in awe. 

"We know that Vinny can't be here with you but we can't let you get married with out a party." 

Lorna spent the evening eating cookies and walking around talking to people about her wedding. Apart from Vinny being there, the only other thing that could make her day perfect would be Nicky. Nicky. A name that she hadn't said out loud in a few months, a name that she avoided thinking about as much as possible. If she did, she would remember how Nicky was dragged away in handcuffs, and she couldn't bare to replay that scene in her head anymore. She shook away the thoughts of her once frizzy haired lover and focused on her new lover. Her husband. On paper, Vinny was perfect. He was everything Lorna had ever dreamed of when she was a little girl. However, Vinny wasn't Nicky. No one could replace Nicky, but Lorna did need a distraction and Vinny served in that role perfectly. She did love him. She had to love him. 

"Are you feeling okay?" asked Piper as she walked over to her, a slice of cake in her hand.

"Yeah, yeah i'm fine. You know what though, i'm feeling a little tired. I think I need to go to bed." 

"Are you sure?" she questioned, a little worried. 

"It's been a really exciting but exhausting day, and anyway tomorrow is Christmas, I need to be well rested for that." 

"Well I guess goodnight Bride." Lorna smiled as she left. 

Upon entering her bunk she reached underneath her so called bed and pulled out a large cut-out of cardboard. Lorna chuckled to herself as she remembered last year when Nicky gave it to her as a Christmas present. The drawing of Lorna's head stuck over to body of a bride and the drawing of Nicky's head stuck over to body of a groom was the first time that Lorna thought she could have a life outside of prison with Nicky. For a very small second she thought of that possibility before she erased it from her mind, she had to marry a man. Now she was married, she should be happy, but why wasn't she? Lorna traced her finger along the scruffy curls of Nicky's hair. Although those curls were only a drawing, she wondered if it would be the closest she would ever get to them again. With Nicky in Max, she wondered if their paths would ever cross. 

After looking at the mood-board for a few more moments, Lorna placed it back under her bed, where she kept it. Occasionally she would take it out and look at it, but only for a few moments. It hurt too much to look at it any longer. She didn't realise how much Nicky meant to her until she could no longer have her. Until she was no longer hers. 

She rolled over on the hard mattress, looking at the wall. She pulled the thin, scratchy blanket over her head and began to cry. She cried for Nicky being alone in Max on Christmas Eve and she cried at the fact that she may never see her again. Eventually her tears dried up and her eyes began to sting, before letting exhaustion take over her body and fall into a light sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, this will have five chapters in total in which I will post one every Saturday in the lead up to Christmas. This was only the introduction so was much shorter than all the others. As always, please comment letting me know your thoughts. Thanks!


	2. The Ghost Of The Past

Lorna awoke to someone lightly shaking her. She rolled over and saw Alex standing over her. 

"Alex, what's wrong? Has something happened?" she panicked. 

"Come with me. I want to show you something." 

"Are you crazy? The COs will send us straight to the shu." Lorna whispered. 

"They won't see us," replied Alex, her face stern. 

"Of course they will," she argued.

"Take hold of my hand, and they won't." She didn't know why but Lorna decided to follow Alex's order and she took her hand. She shuddered as their hands touched, realizing how cold Alex's hand was. 

"Your so cold. Are you feeling okay?" Alex didn't reply. Instead she began to walk to the exit of the dorm, gently dragging Lorna behind her. A CO that Lorna couldn't remember the name of looked directly at them. 

"Oh my gosh Alex. He's seen us. We're done for." 

"Relax. He cant see us," Alex said, chilled out. Sure enough even though the CO was looking directly at them, it seemed as if he was looking right through them. Almost as if they were ghosts. 

"Where are you taking me Alex?" she asked once again. 

"Nicky's." 

"Nicky's? What do you mean?" Before anything else was said, they stepped through a cupboard door and as if by magic, they were stood in a unfamiliar kitchen.

It was large and looked incredibly clean. Almost too clean. 

"Alex what the hell is happening. Am I dreaming. I must be dreaming right? I mean that's the only explanation." She rambled. 

"Lorna stop. Your not dreaming." 

"Then what is this Alex?" Lorna was raising her voice slightly. 

"I want to show you the past." 

"My past?" Lorna questioned. The kitchen that they were currently in was most certainly not form her past. 

"No. Nicky's past?" 

"Why?" Lorna questioned. She was even more confused now. 

"Because I want you to make the right decision." 

"What decision?" 

"You'll see. Now be quiet and watch." Lorna did as she was told and waited for something to happen. 

Soon enough, in walked a woman who looked in her late thirties. Her heels were loud on the white tiled floor. Her black skirt was fitted and she wore a white blouse, with a black blazer over top. Her hair was blonde, a similar colour to Nicky's and reached her shoulders. She walked over to the fridge and opened it, pulling out a carton of orange juice. She then opened a nearby cupboard and pulled out a glass. She placed it out on the counter and poured the orange juice into it. She put the empty carton in the bin before leaning against the counter, sipping from the glass. 

Lorna was watching intently. 

"Who's that?" she asked. She was aware that she had been asking lots of questions, but she was curious as to what was going on. 

"Keep watching." 

Then, through the same door the woman had walked through, someone else entered. She looked younger and her skin was slightly darker. She was wearing an apron. 

"Good morning Ms Nichols," she chirped. As soon as the woman had said that name, everything clicked for Lorna. 

"Is that Nicky's Mother?" Lorna had only heard a few things from Nicky about Marka Nichols but she didn't like the sound of any of it. 

"Iv'e told you to call me Marka, Paloma." Paloma, another name that Nicky had mentioned a few times. However, compared to the other woman, the things that she had heard were much nicer. She knew that Paloma was Nicky's Nanny, she also knew that Paloma was far more much of a Mother to Nicky than Marka had ever been. 

"Sorry Marka. Is Nicky awake?" 

"She should be. I told her to get up half an hour ago." Marka's tone was harsh, the complete opposite of Paloma's soft, tuneful voice. There was a few minutes of silence between the two. Paloma took a pan from the cupboard and began to cook pancakes. Marka was still in the same position. 

Lorna began to hear footsteps, coming down the stairs. They were getting louder and louder. Soon enough, a child walked in through the same door the two older woman had. Her hair was dirty blonde and unruly. She wore a pink floral dress, in which she did not look impressed to be in. Lorna instantly recognized her as a young Nicky.

"Nicole, what have you done to your hair?" Marka asked, harshly as she approached her daughter stiffly. Nicky looked around five. 

"Nothing Mummy." Marka took a handful of Nicky's hair. It was just below her shoulder. Marka stood there with it in her clasp for a few seconds before letting go. 

"Nicole, go sit at the table," she ordered as she walked over to a draw. Paloma was watching awkwardly. Nicky did as she was told. Marka walked back over to Nicky with a pair of scissors in her hand. 

"Mummy, what are you doing?" Nicky asked, turning her head to face Marka. 

"Hold still," said Marka, forcefully turning Nicky's head back round. She took a tight handful of Nicky's hair once again. She placed the scissors just above Nicky's hair, before cutting it with one push. Nicky looked down as her hair fell to the floor. Her once, long curly hair only reached the bottom of her ears. Nicky began to cry. 

"Stop being a baby Nicole. You hair will be easier to handle now its shorter." Nicky held her head in her hands as she sobbed. 

Lorna felt a tear fall form her face. 

"Come on." said Alex. "We have more to see." 

Lorna took one more look at a distraught, young Nicky before turning back round to Alex, taking hold of her outstretched hand. 

xoxoxo

The two were now stood in a classroom. Lorna instantly began to look round for Nicky. She spotted Nicky's hair, laying down on a desk. 

"How old is she?" Lorna asked, looking over at Alex. 

"Sixteen." As soon as Lorna got her answer, she looked back over at Nicky. She then looked round the classroom, filled with about twenty other students and a teacher talking at the front of the classroom. 

"Can anyone tell me what answer they got for question six?" When no one answered the teacher began to look around the classroom, looking for someone to ask. 

"Nicole, how about you?" When Nicky didn't reply or lift her head from the table, the teacher asked her once more, raising her voice. This time Nicky did wake, sitting up quickly. 

"What?" she asked grumpily.

"Were you sleeping Nicole?" the teacher asked, looking at Nicky sternly. 

"No." replied Nicky, sarcastically. "I was working out." There were light snickers from students but shortly stopped as soon as the teacher looked at them all. 

"Nicole, get out! Go to the principle's office right now!" the teacher demanded, pointed towards the door. Nicky took a few seconds, deciding if she should stay and argue, not that it would get her anywhere, or just leave. She decided the easier option, leave. 

She grabbed her black rucksack and left, without opening her mouth again. 

Lorna watched as Nicky was almost screamed at by the principle and whom then called her Mother. Lorna could tell that Nicky was feeling nervous, most likely out of fear of what her Mother would do. 

The woman walked through the office door, looking annoyed. 

"What has she done now?" 

"Back chatting to the teacher, sleeping in class, causing a disturbance. The thing is Ms Nichols, we need to discuss your daughter's future at this school." 

"What do you mean?" she asked, taking a seat next to Nicky but sitting as far away from her as possible. 

"Your daughter has been excluded several times. None of the teachers can manage to deal with her and she's an overall not nice person to be around." 

"So that's it, your just going to kick her out?" Marka, argued, but being careful to keep her voice in the same monotone tone it always is. Nicky knew that Marka was not defending her because she cared, but because she didn't want to deal with trying to find Nicky someplace else to go, a task she knew would be near impossible. 

"I'm not saying your daughter is a hopeless cause, in fact she is rather intelligent, but we're just no equipped to deal with her in the proper way." 

Eventually Marka gave up and dragged Nicky out by her ear. When they reached home, Marka screamed and slapped Nicky several times. 

"Please, I can't watch anymore," begged Lorna as her and Alex were stood back in the Nichols' kitchen. 

"But there is so much more to see," replied Alex. 

"Please show me something happier." 

"I wish I could, but it only gets worse." 

xoxoxo 

The two were now stood in a small and dingy apartment with an eighteen year old Nicky and two other people. 

"What's she doing?" asked Lorna. Although she had a slight idea, she wanted Alex to tell her different. 

"Watch Lorna." 

They watched as Nicky reached over to a scruffy looking boy and took a bag of white powder, looking at it blissfully. Lorna knew about Nicky's addiction, but she had never seen it and she didn't want to. 

Nicky prepared the drugs before tying a tourniquet against her arm and injected the heroin into the crease of her elbow. 

Lorna noticed the bruises and track marks on her arm and gasped. Her eyes were swollen and she looked fed up. Her face was washed with sweat and tiredness. Lorna had never seen anything like this before. She sank to her knees and cried. After everything Nicky had been through before prison, she was aware she had put her through so much in prison. 

"Please Alex," she begged. I can't take anymore. She felt a hand on her shoulder. When she looked round it wasn't Alex's hand, instead Piper's. Lorna slowly stood back up. 

"Piper what are you doing here?" 

"There's plenty more to see. Take my hand." 

Lorna didn't know why, but she did. She was taken into a place that she had never been to before, but she knew exactly what it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why didn't I update yesterday. I forgot it was Saturday. Oops. As always please comment and let me know what you think. Thanks!


	3. The Ghost Of The Present

Piper led Lorna through the halls of the Maximum security prison until they reached a large cell block. Lorna's eyes immediately began to dart around looking for Nicky. When she couldn't find her she looked over to Piper.

"Where is she?" she questioned, desperately. She didn't know how much she needed to see Nicky until she was stood in the same prison that she was in. 

"Look in the corner," replied Piper, in the same tone that Alex had. 

Lorna did as she was told and soon enough, she spotted Nicky, sat on a table in the corner of the cell block, on her own. Her wild her looked a little wilder, and her slim body looked a little too slim. She rushed over to Nicky, and sat down opposite her. Nicky was picking around some kind of slop that looked worse than what they served then back in minimum. 

"Nicky, hey," she spoke, softly. 

"She can't hear you," Piper said, appearing from out of nowhere. 

"I know," Lorna replied. "I just wanted to try to console her, she looks so broken." 

"But she's a Junkie, Addict, Liar." 

Lorna looked up in shock upon hearing such cold words come from Piper's mouth.

"How could you say something like that?"

"I didn't." 

"What do you mean you didn't. I saw it come from your mouth." Lorna couldn't believe that Piper was denying it.

"I mean those words have come from your mouth." 

"What?" Lorna still had no idea as what Piper was talking about and she was beginning to get frustrated. 

"That's what you called her isn't it? A Junkie, Addict, Liar." 

Of course she had. She remembered it now. It was the first time that Nicky had accused Cristopher to not being her fiancé. As soon as those words came out of her mouth, she saw the hurt in Nicky's face. She regretted it instantly. 

"Nichols, cleaning duty," shouted a guard. Nicky dumped her un-eaten slop and followed the guard. She have her a cleaning cart before she began to wonder down the drab corridors. 

xoxoxo

"I'm here about the thing," Nicky said to a female prison guard. 

Lorna looked over at Piper confused, but she just signalled for Lorna to continue watching. 

"Do you understand the payment?" the guard questioned. Nicky nodded, reluctantly. The guard began to walk over to a cupboard with Nicky a few steps behind. 

The guard let Nicky into the cupboard before entering herself. Lorna and Piper also squeezed into the tight space before the guard shut it again. 

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small plastic bag filled with a white substance. Lorna gasped, finally understood what was going on and she couldn't believe it. 

The guard waved the small back in front of Nicky and as Nicky reached for it, the guard pulled it back away. 

"Payment first," she growled, putting the bag back into her pocket. She began to unbuckle her belt and pulled down her trousers. Nicky looked unsure. The guard placed a firm hand on the top of Nicky's head and pushed her down. 

xoxoxo 

Nicky made her way into her cell with the Heroin stuffed in her bra. The cell door was locked behind her and Lorna noticed how cold it was in there. 

Nicky slid into the bottom bed. He roommate was screaming in her sleep. Nicky rolled over on her side and pulled the bag from her bra. She rolled it around her fingers before licking her lips and looking at it longingly. 

Lorna began to beg Nicky not to take it, even though she knew she couldn't hear her. She watched as Nicky snorted the drug and her heart broke. If only she had shown her the same amount of love that Nicky did to her, she would never of relapsed. Nicky finally looked relaxed, and at ease. 

"Please, please, Piper stop. I can't see anymore." 

"But isn't it what Junkie, Addict, Liars do?" 

"Stop calling her that!" Lorna shouted.

"Those are your words, not mine." 

"Please show me something happier." 

"Her life isn't happy," replied a different voice. Lorna looked round and instead of Piper, Red was standing there.


	4. The Ghost Of Times Yet To Come

Lorna found herself walking down an unfamiliar street with Red by her side. 

"What are we doing here?" she questioned. It was snowing and because she was only wearing a prison nightie she knew she should be cold, so she was glad she was in the middle of this dream, or vision, or whatever it may be. 

"I want to show you something," she replied. Lorna decided not to question what, she had learnt that she wasn't going to get an answer like that. 

Red began to point to a person sat in a bus stop. It was hard to see anything about the person because they were wearing a black beanie and had a thin, dirty coat pulled up over their face. It was also dark out. 

"Is that Nicky?" 

"Go and look." 

Lorna did as she was told and approached the figure. While she knew the person couldn't see her, it still felt a little awkward. 

The person lifted their head up slightly and sure enough, it was Nicky. She had bags under her eyes and she looked tired and sweaty. 

"Is this where she sleeps?" Lorna asked, looking back up at Red. 

"She has no where else to go." 

"What about you? Me?" 

"No one has seen her since she got sent to Max." 

Lorna couldn't believe what she was hearing. She couldn't believe that this was the life Nicky was leading now. She knew what an amazing person Nicky was and she knew that she was intelligent, she hated the fact that her life was being wasted like that. 

A rich looking man walked past but stopped when he saw Nicky. He looked her square in the face. 

"You disgust me. Go and get a job," he said before walking off. It broke Lorna's heart hearing how someone could speak to Nicky like that, to anyone like that. 

A tear fell from Nicky's eye. She wanted to comfort her. She wanted to hold her tightly, kiss her forehead and tell her that everything would be okay. Tell her that her life was worth something and that she was loved. 

That was when Lorna realised she had just made the biggest mistake of her life. A bigger mistake than getting sent to prison, because in prison she met Nicky and she knew that she loved Nicky, Not Vinny. She married Vinny in order to forget about Nicky, but it was impossible to hide her feeling anymore. 

"I love her," Lorna said plainly. 

"I know you do. And she loves you too. She would do anything for you." 

"How do I make this right?" Lorna asked, she needed to do something. Before Red could reply, Nicky stood up and walked towards an ally. Lorna and Red followed.

xoxoxo

Nicky approached a man, completely wearing black. 

"How much?" she asked, croakily. Lorna knew what was happening and she couldn't believe what she was seeing. 

"Fifty," he replied. Nicky looked unsure. 

"I don't have fifty," she replied. The man took a minute to think before speaking again. 

"Fine. As your a first time customer, it's on the house." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small bag of white powder. He handed it to Nicky and she muttered some kind of 'thanks' before walking away. 

Nicky went back to the bus shelter. Lorna watched helplessly as Nicky overdosed right in front of her. 

"What happens to her?" Lorna questioned, not really wanting to know that answer. 

"Keep watching."

xoxoxo

Lorna stood at the end of a hospital bed with two Doctors trying to pump her stomach. 

One Doctor looked towards the other and shook his head. 

"We need to stop." 

The other agreed. 

"Time of death, 21:32." 

"No!" screamed Lorna. 

Lorna closed her eyes and when she opened them again, she was outside a church. She saw Nicky's Mother talking to two other people beside a large oak tree. 

"Overdose apparently. Of course that would be how she dies," Marka began. "I've always know Nicole would end up like this. She's never been good for anyone." 

"But she's good for me," said Lorna. "I love her. I want her. I need her." 

"You should've told her that. You should've shown her that. Think of all the times she's been there for you," said Red. 

Lorna looked over as the casket holding Nicky was lowered into the ground. She ran up to the edge of the hole. 

"What do I do?" 

"Tell her how your really feel." 

Suddenly the sky went black and Red disappeared, along with everyone else. The casket opened Lorna saw Nicky's body. 

Lorna felt a strong gust of wind and she fell down the hole, screaming. She landed on top of Nicky. The casket shut and she was plunged into darkness. 

"Please!" Lorna screamed. "I promise to give Nicky all my love. I promise to be there for her. I love her! Please!" 

There was a bright flash of light, causing Lorna to shut her eyes tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll post the final chapter on Christmas Day. Please comment and let me know what you think about this. Thanks!


	5. A Christmas Wish

Lorna opened her eyes. There she was, back in her prison bunk. She looked at the clock on the wall. It was seven the next morning. What had happened last night? Was it a dream? It felt too real to be a dream. Then she realised that it was Christmas. She jumped out of her bed and quickly changed, not even bothering to shower. She was too late for breakfast so she went towards the common room in seek of her prison family. 

What did last night mean? 

As soon as she entered the common room, she spotted her family gathered round a table in the corner. 

"Lorna, Hey," greeted Piper as she took a seat next to her. 

"What happened last night?" Lorna asked. 

"What do you mean?" Piper had a confused expression. 

"Last night, with the visions or whatever they were." 

"I have no idea what your talking about," replied Piper looking at her as if she was crazy. 

"Maybe you were dreaming?" suggested Alex. 

"Yeah, I guess so." Lorna knew that what she felt was too real to be a dream but she didn't know what else to call it. 

They spent hours talking and laughing. Christmas seemed to be the one day a year that people were a little happier. Usually Lorna would be too but she couldn't stop thinking about Nicky, all alone in Max. Would she have a special dinner? Did she even know it was Christmas? 

"Holy shit," said Alex suddenly. Lorna looked around to see what she was taking about. As she looked over at the entrance she was convinced she was still dreaming. There stood a disheveled looking Nicky, holding a net bag over her shoulder. 

Lorna leaped up from her seat, letting it drag along the floor and fell into Nicky's arms before anyone else could. She could hear the CO telling her to let go, but she didn't care. She had been given a second chance. She felt Nicky wrap her arms around her waist. 

"So you missed me then?" Nicky asked, in the husky voice Lorna had missed so much. 

"Just a little bit," she replied, laughing. Lorna finally decided to pull back when the CO threatened to throw her in the shu. She couldn't bear to not see Nicky again. 

"I was hoping you missed me more than a little bit," Nicky said, playing along with Lorna's joke. Everything felt so natural between to two, a feeling Lorna couldn't get with anyone else. 

"You know I did," she said finally. That was the truth. When Lorna noticed the CO was no longer watching them, she hugged Nicky again. 

"Please don't let go." 

"Never baby, never," replied Nicky. 

This was the best Christmas yet. Getting Nicky back was what she had wished for and finally it had come true. 

As she stood there, engulfed in Nicky's warm and loving embrace, she began to think. What would she do about Vinny? She didn't know. But what she did know was that all she needed, was right in front of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go. That's the end. This was just a short little epilogue to wrap it up.  
> I really hope you've enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. I'll get back to writing Till Death Do Us Part in the new year. Please let me know what you thought. I guess all that's left for me to say is, Merry Christmas!


End file.
